This year marks the 17th anniversary of the death of Tom Vander Woude, a Catholic father who died on the feast of the Nativity of the Blessed Virgin Mary while saving his son, Joseph, from drowning in a septic tank. The Diocese of Arlington, Virginia, is investigating whether to open Vander Woude’s cause for canonization.
The fourth of Vander Woude’s seven sons says the way his father lived his life helped him be prepared to lose it for the sake of love.
“He was willing to make that sacrifice for Joseph that day,” Bob Vander Woude told CatholicVote in a Sept. 25 phone interview. “I mean, you [can] ask the question, who would jump into a tank of sewage? I mean it’s just, it’s so detestable. But he was prepared to do that because of his fasting, his sacrificing that he made for his family that he had done over the years in all kinds of ways, his devotion to the Eucharist, his devotion to Our Lady. Like he knew what he was called to do at that moment. It was to save his son.”
Vander Woude was a devout Catholic and father, who was a pillar of his local Catholic community. Bob told CatholicVote that his father moved the family to Manassas, Virginia, in the 1980s to ensure the boys received a devout Catholic education. At the time, Seton High School, where the boys attended, was a small school without much financial support.
According to the Tom Vander Woude Guild, he was winterizing the pool on his farm in Virginia on September 8, 2008, when he realized his son, Joseph, who has Down syndrome, was nowhere to be seen. He noticed the septic tank’s top had been removed, ran to the tank, and saw that Joseph had fallen in.
Vander Woude called for the farmhand to tell his wife, Mary Ellen, to call 911, and then jumped in the tank, knowing that either the fumes or drowning could quickly kill his son. He pushed his son up while the farmhand pulled.
“When Tom’s wife Mary Ellen arrived after calling 911 all she could do was to help the workman hold Joseph up with a strap under his arms, knowing that her husband, the love of her life, her partner in God’s plan lay below giving his life to save their son,” the guild’s website states. “When the paramedics arrived, they immediately pulled out and began treating Joseph. They then pulled the lifeless body of Tom out but despite their attempts, God had already called Tom to Himself.” He was 66 years old.
Tom’s death was incredibly difficult for the family, Bob shared, as they mourned the loss of a beloved father and family leader. In the years to come, each of the sons felt called to pick up the reins of Tom’s legacy, Bob said.
“We all felt like he was somebody to really model our lives after,” he said. He shared that he joined the military and became a pilot, adding, “I did that in many ways because I wanted to follow the path my dad followed. And so I really saw him as an example in many, many ways.”
The Tom Vander Goude Guild is promoting the cause for canonization under the category of “offer of life,” as defined in a motu proprio by Pope Francis in 2017. This cause of sainthood, separate from martyrdom or heroic virtue, involves “a free and voluntary offer of life and heroic acceptance propter caritatem (meaning: because of charity or through love) of a certain and untimely death.”
In May 2025, Bishop Michael Burbidge of Arlington appointed a vice-postulator for the case reviewing Tom’s cause for canonization, which has yet to be officially opened. A vice-postulator works with a postulator in Rome, who helps gather evidence for a cause of sainthood. This is the most recent update to Tom’s cause.
“Growing up with my dad… he was an example of a tremendous father and a leader,” Bob said. “Not just in our [family], like he was a coach in every way and over the years all for all my brothers. But he was also very much the spiritual leader in our home.”
His father’s witness as a parent, worker, and husband continues to inspire Bob to this day. He said he grew up seeing his father lead the daily Rosary on his knees, no matter how tired he was.
Tom was also extremely disciplined — Bob said he fasted on a regular basis, despite the fact that he worked hard manual labor.
“I think almost every Friday, I don’t know if I ever saw my dad eat breakfast or lunch,” he said.
Tom also loved the Eucharist, as he often attended daily Mass in his later years, as well as a weekly 2 a.m. Holy Hour. Bob shared that his father also had a strong devotion to St. Joseph the Worker and the Blessed Mother. He also hosted an annual Marian day and procession on his property that drew a crowd of 300. When one of Tom’s sons became a priest, he led a Eucharistic procession at the yearly party honoring Our Lady.
Reflecting on his father’s devotion to Our Lady, Bob said, “And it’s no surprise, to us anyway, that he was taken on September 8th, the birthday of Mary.”
Tom’s family now asks for his intercession in their daily life, and Bob shares his legacy with his own children, especially those who did not have the chance to meet their grandfather. He said they often ask for his prayers in everyday tasks like fixing things and working on school subjects.
“Now with having older children, I do pray to him for intercession for wisdom, and for prudence, and how to guide,” Bob added, “because he was a tremendous guidance.”
Bob told CatholicVote that his father’s generosity and charity to the local Catholic community was exemplary. He shared about a time when Tom helped a family with 12 children move from Texas to Virginia.
“They came and lived at our home,” Bob said. “He offered our home to them. They lived with us for some time until they could get their feet on the ground.”
Bob shared about his father’s other acts of service to the community, which he described as exemplary, including teaching natural family planning with Mary Ellen at their parish and coaching high school and college sports. He also volunteered to help Seton High School get off the ground.
His father’s efforts to build up the school helped it become a thriving institution today. Small Catholic communities, Bob noted, “only really survive if you have people who are volunteering or willing to step out of themselves and do things.”
“These are the kind of characteristics that when you think of a holy man of God, it’s in charity, it’s in his prayer life, it’s in doing his vocation, living his vocation, fully as a father and a husband,” Bob said, “and that’s my dad.”
CatholicVote staff writer McKenna Snow also contributed to this report.
The post ‘He knew what he was called to do’: The heroic story of Tom Vander Woude, Virginia Catholic man who died saving his son appeared first on CatholicVote org.